Partners
by sasahara17
Summary: Give X character Y cyborg and what do you get? Who knows... A collection of oneshots where Cyborgs suddenly become a worldwide phenomenon. OC warning.
1. Blank Page

Disclaimer; I do not own Gunslinger Girl, it is the rightful property of Aida Yu.

Additional Disclaimer; 

I do not own Black Lagoon, the rightful owner is… Rei Hiroe?

The Handsome Men as always, belong to Person WMA 

A/N This fic assumes that the church of violence is a front for the CIA in Roanapur and that Eda is in fact a CIA agent.

---

Blank Page

--

Eda of the Church of Violence

--- 

"Ohy, Ohy, Ohy! What the hell is this?"

Eda pointed rudely at the small brunette in a miniaturized nun's habit that was innocently flipping through a magazine, not even paying attention to the nun. Eda was still sore about her ruined bounty hunt, a hunt which resulted in her being held at gunpoint by a crazy short kid all the way to the Lagoon Company offices.

She had decided she had her fill of pint sized psychopaths. Wanted for murder in the first degree by Uncle Sam or not, Eda declared that she'd die happy if she never had to meet another kid with anything larger than a water pistol ever again. So what the hell was this?

"Well, I'm not really sure about the details, but headquarters sent this little child here to be your partner." Yolanda tried to inject some humor into the situation. "They were so impressed with your job with the plates, Uncle Sam decided you were eligible a program to train the latest weapon our country has to offer…"

"THIS?" Eda voiced skeptically.

"Well you did meet Hansel and Gretel before." Yolanda tried very hard not to laugh at her subordinate's reaction to her new assignment.

"That was different!" Eda protested.

The little girl cleared her throat to draw their attention and held out the magazine while pointing to one of the articles inside. "I want this one!"

If Eda wasn't paying attention to the girl and her choice of reading material, she was now. Eda did a double take. "You… want a high powered assault rifle?"

"Fabrique Nationale de Herstal FN F2000. Empty weight three point six kilograms. Length twenty seven point three inches. Effective range, five hundred meters. Uses standard STANAG Magazines in 5.56 x 45mm NATO cartridges," The girl elaborated. "It's a little big though…"

Eda compared the girl to Gretel, and despite the dissimilar physical appearance, Eda got the same vibe from her. As one would expect from someone almost killed by Gretel, Eda was not very happy to come to this conclusion.

"Oh! But if I stick the grenade launcher module on, it's perfect!" The girl spun on her toes with a flourish. "You'll get it for me, right Miss Eda?"

Eda fainted.

---

As it turned out, the brunette was a mechanical body. A cyborg developed by the United States government as a specialized assassin. With physical abilities far above that of regular human beings, these mechanical bodies were supposedly the latest most effective weapon against crime and terrorism fielded by first world countries across the globe.

And now Eda had one.

She didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

In the decade or so she had spent in the service of her country, Eda of the Church of Violence, also Eda of the Central Intelligence Agency, had never quite come across anything quite like this.

The girl was a blank sheet when she arrived in Roanapur. No name, no I.D, nothing. Apparently, she had been 'programmed' to come to Roanapur and find Eda in order to be named, given a gun, and do whatever it is that little girls with high powered assault rifles with an integrated grenade does.

Lovely.

This mechanical body was apparently a new 'long distance field operations' type, and so didn't need much maintenance from the one white coat the sent to accompany her. Eda wasn't even aware there were other types of cyborgs, so she didn't really care about that stupid little detail. What counted was this little problem.

Never in a thousand years did Eda dream she would have to page through a baby names book in order to name for an excited preteen girl.

"Do you have one yet?" The short haired brunette asked for the umpteenth time.

"No." Eda growled. Eda never expected to have a child of her own, having already foreseen that the city of Roanapur would take her long before she could settle down and have a kid. It was inevitable, and Gretel had come oh so close to making her just another name on the wall of Patriots.

"Pleeeeese give me a name!" The girl whined. "I've been waiting for one for three weeks now!"

"Shut up!" Eda fumed. "I'll give you one when I find one!"

Picking a name was more difficult than it was turning out to be. Eda was tempted to pull out the book and point to the first name on the page and be done with it, but the scientist, may his soul burn in the fires of hell, shot that idea down pretty quick.

Apparently the Italians had this idiot named Lauro who was such a loser that his own cyborg shot him. After that some basic guidelines were set down. One of which was name your girl correctly, so she might not put a 'point forty Smith and Wesson' into the back of your head.

Eda wondered why the country she had already devoted her life towards had seen fit to torment her like this. If she was going to die, let someone like Revy or Chan be the ones to do her in, not death by some whining preteen girl. Let her have a little respect damnit!

Speaking of Revy, Eda remembered the gunwoman was due to show up for late night drinks in the chapel tonight! If Revy ever saw her now; she'd be able to never live it down!

It would be much worse than that too. As of late, Eda had been pestering the half Chinese gunslinger about her relationship with that hot stud Japanese salary-man-turned pirate. Every drinking session, Eda had asked Revy whether she'd knocked boots with her prince in distress.

Prince gets captured by schoolgirl and big samurai, gallant damsel with dual handguns come to the rescue, then they do it like monkeys. Or at least, that's what Eda had been suggesting to Revy on nearly a daily basis now. Given how shy Revy actually was to Rock, it was all the more fun.

Revy had actually warned Eda that when she finally dug up some dirt on Eda there would be hell to pay. Having never actually had anything to hide, other than being a CIA operative of course, Eda dared her drinking buddy. Well she was regretting that foolhardy dare now.

Eda seriously considered eating a bullet to spare herself from Revy's revenge.

"Pleeeese Ms Eda! Everybody is calling me 'the cyborg' and 'the girl'! I want a N. A. M…"

"Maybe I'll just name you Rebecca and be done with it!" Eda snapped.

Oops.

--

"So… run that by me again."

"She's a distant cousin on my sister's mother in law's side three times removed…"

"No I got that part." Revy, whose real first name was incidentally Rebecca, worked hard to stifle her laughter. In other words, she chugged another beer.

"How is it that your really distant relative, who happens to have my name, dress in a nun's habit and walk around with an assault rifle two thirds her height, decides to come all the way from the Big Apple to this dingy place?"

"I have no idea." Eda said truthfully.

Revy was having a ball watching the older woman actually be uncomfortable for the first time in almost forever. Revenge never tasted so sweet, even better than beer. "Ah, and you happen to be her only living relative?"

"Please stop Revy. I don't know how to fight this."

Revy pressed on mercilessly. "Oh but I must! I must know how the great gunrunner Eda has a relative that is so familiar with her that she calls you 'Sis-E'!"

Eda's head impacted with the table. She emitted a low groan.

How Rebecca (the cyborg, as opposed to the gunwoman across the table) ever came up with that ridiculous nickname was beyond her. Nicknames were common in the city of villains. Revy was called 'Two Hands'. Balalaika was called 'Fry Face', a term that was both patronizing and respectful at the same time. Even Yolanda had one, but it was so obscure nobody knew it. Eda never expected to gain one of her own, especially one that sounded like 'Sissy'.

She imagined a mini Eda, dressed in her provocative party clothes, cheerleading her futile attempts to hold Revy at bay on her shoulder. Think Eda. Revy is bowling you over! Your pride as a gunman, no, as a professional, rides on this! "Aren't you worried that she might turn out like Gretel?" Eda blurted out.

The mini Eda fell flat on her face. Nice going Eda. You might have tipped the whole 'don't let the world know about cyborgs thing out of the bag'.

Revy shrugged, "Rock will love her."

Comeback! The mini Eda pumped her fist in the air.

"Oh, Rock likes kids? That's a pretty cavalier attitude you got there Revy. Planning for some of your own?" Eda seized the opportunity to turn this embarrassing conversation around. Revy actually gaped when she realized her mistake.

Victory dance. Ha! Take that Rebecca! This is how a real master of conversation…

"Ohh, Sis-E!"

Mini waved a white flag and ran away. Oh hell.

Rebecca came running up to her, now with an even bigger weapon slung effortlessly over her shoulders. "Look at this! It's a real live Milkor MGL! I've never seen one before! I took it from stores. Can I have it? Please? Please?"

Both Eda and Revy stared in horror as the preteen girl who barely reachedtheir shoulders, ran up to them swinging around a loaded grenade launcher like a harmless stuffed teddy bear as she ran towards them…

So excited was the young cyborg that she hadn't yet realized that her finger was spinning the massive weapon from inside the trigger guard.

"OH SHIT!"

"FUCK!"

Then, as was inevitable for someone playing with a big gun from inside the trigger guard, little Rebecca accidentally depressed the Grenade Launcher's trigger, and it fired a single explosive into the ceiling.

--

"Like I said, you need to train the girl. Unlike other models these ones are a bit temperamental because their conditioning is lower." The Scientist admonished.

"I… see." Eda nodded, her arm in a sling and face being bandaged up.

"It was fortunate Rebecca was able to throw both you and Miss Revy out of the collapsing building before escaping herself. It would be disappointing for you two perished some a simple accident." The scientist continued.

He did not mention Rebecca had thrown both Revy and Eda through the air into glass window arches of the Chapel. It was a two story drop from there. But then again, being catapulted from ground level into an almost ten foot throw like basket balls was something Eda was keen not to be reminded about.

Cyborgs were really scary, taking two grown women and throwing them through second story windows like basket balls before running out of a collapsing building unharmed.

She was lucky Revy had woken up the next day and written off the whole thing as an alcohol induced dream, despite the gunwoman's dislocated shoulder and a destroyed chapel. The cover story was that the two drinking buddies went a little wild that night and used an M76 to destroy the chapel in a drunken fit.

Yolanda had even the audacity to kick up the prices for the Lagoon Company's next order.

Of course, most of the damage was 'her fault'. As penance, Eda broken arm or not, was ordered to do menial labor for the next three months with docked pay.

"Okay, now that I'm done with you, I would like to inform you that Yolanda had ordered you to you should go do the dorms. Ricardo brought a couple of his friends back last night and one of them vomited all over their beds. The stench is quite bad." The scientist finished.

Eda wanted to cry.

--

Thirty five years of life… Ten years in the services… amounts to this.

Cleaning the dishes.

Somberly, robotically, Eda rinsed the white porcelain plates. Her life had really taken a turn for the worse ever since Rebecca had barged into her life and sent it straight to hell.

Doing the laundry. Changing the sheets. Mopping the floor.

She wasn't a CIA operative anymore. She was a cleaning lady. Yolanda had taken her gun from her and ordered her to sober out and think her actions through.

Think what actions through? Rebecca had just arrived!

"Right. That's the dishes." Eda sighed somberly as she dried the last of the plates and put it back on the rack. "Now I have to sweep the yard…"

"You don't have to do that, Sis-E."

Eda spun around to face a bashful looking brunette in a nun's habit. "You!"

"Hello Sis-E."

"Get out! I never want to see you again!" Eda shouted.

"…Okay." Rebecca sighed understandably, tears welling in her eyes. She turned to leave "… I just wanted to tell you that I did the yard for you."

Rebecca walked away…

"Wait!"

Now Eda may be short tempered, childish, playful, money grubbing, cocky… well you get the gist, but that was her cover. Heck all the convent members who were CIA had their covers. The lived it, they breathed it, never for a moment removing their masks even among each other.

In a city like Roanapur, a moment's hesitation or weakness would mean certain death.

They had to become the people they claimed to be, if not, the Church of Violence would be revealed to be a CIA getup in an instant. However once in a while Eda's real personality, that of a thoughtful, intelligent and sometimes empathic woman peeked out.

And so here it did.

Rebecca turned around at the sound of Eda's voice. Eda make a quick but thorough check to make sure nobody listening. When it was clear, her hand clamped around the smaller girls arm and dragged the small cyborg into the kitchen.

Rebecca allowed herself to be led on without complaint.

"Why are you here?" Eda finally asked. "Speak freely."

Rebecca, unable to look Eda in the eye, answered. "I was ordered by the Head Director of Cyborg Operations Mr. Superior and CIA Director Robert Ludlum to come to Roanapur to serve as backup for Agent…"

"No." Eda said firmly. Then she reemphasized her question. "Why are you here? A cyborg? Your file says that you are fourteen. That's it."

As if to emphasize her point Eda removed her glasses.

It was a symbolic gesture. Her glasses were her mask, just as Yolanda had her eye patch. Under those opaque purple glasses were they azure blue eyes that her parents so often remarked were beautiful… eyes that she hid to hide her shame. She did not want Revy or Rock, wanted outlaws in their own nations but people she felt were her dear friends, to look into her eyes.

It was the hardest part about being a CIA agent, knowing one day she might have to turn on those she had befriended with her false face. The glasses hid her true self, so she could face the dirty city of Roanapur with confidence as the gunrunner Eda or the Church of Violence.

But when she took her glasses off, she wasn't that person anymore.

She wanted to be completely honest about something.

"I imagine you have a family somewhere." Eda said.

Rebecca looked into those blue depths with her olive green ones. Tears came to her eyes. "I… don't have one."

Eda was taken aback. Rebecca began to tear up.

"When I woke up in the agency, I couldn't remember anything. I knew where I was supposed to go and what I was supposed to do, but I didn't know anything about myself. Not even my real name" Rebecca confided.

And then Eda began to listen.

-

"I was alone. There were tests done on me before the scientists decided I was ready to be sent to you. During that time I was without a name. I had no handler, no identity. I wandered the halls alone during my free time. The other girl in the facility… they called her Black... often talked with me. She was a cyborg too, and was alone as I was. There were other cyborgs in the facility too, but they never saw us.

"Black and I… we often watched from the windows of our prison at the others girls laughing and playing. And those girls… they had 'Handlers'. That's the term for the adults in charge of the girls. Some of the girls had good handlers who treated them well, others… they weren't bad, but they did make me worry for those girls. But they all had one thing I did not.

"They weren't alone. They had each other and they had their family. Fathers, brothers, teachers… the Handler could be many things, but above all I found these adults were what gave the girls purpose, gave them life. Even Black, the cyborg used as a test bed for new technologies, had the scientists, and some of them even cared greatly for her.

"It was what I lacked. I lacked a purpose.

"Can you imagine, living day by day, not knowing who you are, where you came from and what you are supposed to do? Living as a blank page, with no purpose in life? That was how I felt. I didn't have any reason to exist. I just did. It's not a pleasant feeling. I had no identity I could call my own, even if I tried to forge one myself… I have nothing to work from in the first place. I didn't even know where to begin.

"But one day I knew I was going to get one.

"I don't know where I came from or who my parents were, they wouldn't tell me that. But one day I was told that I was to be assigned to someone named 'Edwina Darwin', a CIA agent who was in need of help. Suddenly, you were they only name I knew and you were supposed to give me my name and identity.

"You were my Handler.

"I was so excited. After three months of doing nothing, I was beginning to doubt my own worth. Can you imagine, having this empty void in your heart suddenly being filled? I had a purpose now. There was something.

"I wanted to meet you. I found out as much about you as I could. You graduated at the top of your class, you've selflessly dedicated your life to safeguarding our country, you where going to be my handler.

"I realized that even if I didn't have a past, I had a future.

"You were the person who would give me my name, my identity, my future.

Miss Eda, even before I met you, you gave me hope."

-

"… gave me hope." Rebecca tearfully finished, before breaking into anguished sobs. "And now I've messed it all up for you!"

Elsa didn't know how to react.

Never in her life had she come across something like this. Considering she lived in [the self proclaimed City of Villains, fought two pint sized murderers, fended off a horde of crazed bounty hunters, and more recently learned that her government was making killing machines, this was quite a feat.

How was she supposed to deal with a crying adolescent girl?

Eda coughed into her fist. The one not in a sling. "Err… look Rebecca, it's not all that bad…"

"I broke your arm, hurt your friend destroyed your home and got you into trouble." Rebecca brawled. "You probably hate me now!"

"Not all that bad!" Eda tried. "Look Rebecca, this is Roanapur. Shit like this… it happens all the time. Just the other day, the Yellow Flag got blown up (again). People say they hate each other all the time!"

That didn't exactly help matters and Rebecca cried even more. Eda was beginning to worry. Oh hell, those idiots in suits just dropped her into a twisted from of parenthood without any warning.

"…which is normal around here when tempers run high!" Eda continued. "Relax Rebecca! Everything will be fine after we cool off. I don't hate you, I'm just… annoyed with you."

Rebecca stiffing her tears, paused to look at her handler. "…you mean it?"

Eda put on her best cocky pose and grinned. "Hey this is Roanapur, the city where it doesn't matter where the hell you came from or what you did. As long as you're still breathing the next morning you're good to go!"

"Really?"

"Really." Eda held out her hand. "Well we got off to a bad start, so let's start over. Call me Eda, that's what everybody does."

Rebecca looked dumbly at the hand for a moment.

"You're supposed to shake it."

"Oh!" Rebecca early took Eda's hand and shook it.

"Not so hard was it? I think this is the start of a wonderful partner…"

Rebecca should be more careful with her own strength sometimes. She was so enthusiastic about mending the bridge that she shook Eda a tad too hard, and ended up dislocated the older woman's arm at the shoulder.

"AHHHH!"

"I'M SORRY!"

--

Yolanda was very amused.

"Well you're not on cleaning duty anymore, and I think the amount of punishment you received was sufficient. I'm not docking your pay checks anymore."

Eda stifled a witty remark. Both her arms were in casts. It was a humiliating position for a gunwoman such as herself to be in.

"Anyway, I heard you almost patched it up with the girl." Yolanda mused. "Such a pity. She was crying in the convent last night."

"You're mistaken Sister." Eda blurted out.

Yolanda fingered her Desert Eagle dangerously. Eda had broken an unspoken rule in the Convent; never raise your voice to the head honcho.

Prime reason? The Big Desert Eagle she had holstered in the folds of her habit. "How so?"

"We didn't almost patch it up." Eda corrected. "I still am ready to accept the girl."

"Is that so?" Yolanda said, a slight smile touching her features. "You can come in now."

To her surprise the door of Yolanda's office creaked open and a timid looking Rebecca crept in, Cello case containing her FN F2000 on her back.

"Do you mean it?" Rebecca asked cautiously.

Eda paused for a second, and then smiled. "Of course."

Rebecca ran up to embrace the CIA agent disguised as a gunrunning nun with a relived smile on her face and tears streaking down her face.

"Hey watch it, both my arms are broken!" Eda warned.

"Sorry." Rebecca said between sobs.

"I expect you to train her how to use that gun." Yolanda said as she lit a cigar in her mouth. "Now that out top gunman is incapacitated, we'll need a substitute as soon as we can."

"Yes ma'am!" Eda attempted to snap off a salute, but with both her arms in casts, it was all but impossible. Sighing, Eda instead ruffled her new partner's head through her habit since the girl's head was buried against her chest. "Cute kid."

Yolanda blew a puff of smoke off and reclined into her chair.

"I think this will be the start of a wonderful partnership." The old nun smirked.

And it was.

---

THE END

-- 

A/N

What's there to say? It's a crossover.

I actually made this in hopes of contributing to the existing Fanon (Nacht revived Emilio, Person crafted the Handsome Men, Sheo created Giuseppe…). Perhaps I'm being a little arrogant by trying to follow in their footsteps, especially since I'm just randomly selecting characters from other series to give partners, but that's just me.

There may or may not be a second chapter to this. I'm writing one on Seras Victoria from Hellsing and her new cyborg tag along, but it's not turning out too well. Theme discusses Seras and her new ward's humanity, or lack thereof.

Perhaps I should just drop that and go off and do one on Roe from L/R. A master of disguise teaching his little cyborg to use paper masks and disguises will go down well.

Thanks You, Read and Review Please!

-

-

-

-


	2. Half Pint Panic

Disclaimer; I no not own Gunslinger Girl or Full Metal Panic. They are the rightful copyright of Yuu Aida and Shoji Gatoh. Danielle... whatever her last name is, is the copyright of Person With Many Aliases.

--

**Half Pint Panic **

--

Sousuke Sagara, Mithril Agent

--

"It feels a bit weird Sousuke. It's never been this long for you to have attended class without interruption." Kaname giggled as the elevator rose.

"Mithril had given me explicit orders to remain on standby." Sousuke shrugged. What he neglected to tell Kaname was that Tessa was very chirpy over the phone and kept hinting to him of a nice surprise she'd be sending him sometime soon.

Given the last time she'd given him a 'surprise', the young Sergeant was not taking any chances…. which explained the reason why Sousuke's safe house was completely spotless as if waiting for a Mardukas grade inspection.

"Well I'm not about to look a gift horse in the mouth!" Kaname chirped happily. "Maybe being away from the military has been a good thing. You haven't blown anything up recently!"

Sousuke hesitated on the steps for a moment.

Truth was, he had expended the last of his explosives on yet another 'love letter' incident, and his supplier had been unable to procure him his usual monthly shipment because of yet another sudden outbreak of violence in the Middle East.

He debated on the merits of informing Kaname that he was in the processes of making a few homemade pipe bombs, but seeing her all too happy face, Sousuke decided against it.

"Sousuke? You something wrong?" Kaname asked.

"It's nothing Miss Chidori." Sousuke replied, and they continued on.

"Well we're here." Kaname announced as the elevated reached Sousuke's floor. "Haven't been to this place in ages. Remember when you left my notebook behind?"

"Yes." Sousuke shivered at the memory. Sure she could laugh about it now, but Sousuke still remembered that creepy cop that had somehow gained an everlasting vendetta against him. It did have that nice bike ride though… ah fond memories.

"Well here we are."

Sousuke reached into his bag to fetch his keys when the unexpected happened; the door swung open without him even touching it.

Sousuke reacted instantaneously.

Moving as a blur, the seasoned soldier seized his precious ward by the shirt, threw her to the ground. Ignoring her indignant yelp he quickly upholstered his Glock, and aimed it at the interloper. The safe house was potentially breached by an intruder, a worse case scenario. His game face on, Sousuke prepared himself for the worst.

Whatever he had been expecting, Sousuke certainly did not expect this.

"Welcome home, Goushujin-sama."

That was the first thing Sousuke Sagara and Kaname Chidori laid eyes upon when the door to the safe house swung open; the sight of a small girl, no older than twelve kneeling on the floor in full goth-loli regalia.

In a rare loss of self control, Sousuke's mouth dropped open.

"Goushujin-sama, I come with complements from the Madame Captain. Is the Ojou-sama staying over? I can prepare the appropriate sleeping arrangements for you…"

And with that, Sousuke's mouth ran dry.

"SOU-SU-KE" Kaname growled, pushing herself off the floor. Her forehead had a slight bruise on it from where she had been forcefully thrown to the ground, and her eyebrow was visibly twitching. And then there was the vicious smile.

He broke out in cold sweat.

The Paper Fan that magically appeared in her hands merely confirmed Sousuke's worst fears. Despite still being in disbelief at the surrealism of the sight before him, Sousuke shut his eyes and braced himself for the pain.

"Goshujin-sama, you are sweating and your face is pale. If you are ill, I would advise you to disrobe quic-" WHAP!

--

"Are you sure this is wise?" The scientist asked the diminutive captain. Tessa sighed behind her desk, it was the third time since a multi million dollar girl had been shipped off via helicopter to Japan that the scientist had come up to her office.

Not wanting to go through yet another explanation to the scientist, the young captain looked pleadingly to her second in command, standing at attention by her side as always, for aid.

"Kaname Chidori needs a full time bodyguard." Madrukas stated plainly. "Sergeant Sagara is regularly recalled to pilot the Arbalest. While he is an… exceptional bodyguard, and is there by his own request, we cannot ignore the enormous failure in security in the instance where Miss Chidori was almost assassinated in his absence."

"Yes, yes, we've been through this!" The scientist waved sourly.

"Then why are you here again? This is the third time this week you have been up here!" Had the scientist been a sane person, he would have broken down in abject terror. Mardukas was in full intimidation mode. His harrowed eyes drilled holes into your very soul, and he had this aura of menace that seemed to surround him like cologne.

Richard Mardukas was a scary man.

Dr. Giuliani was not most men. He hadn't some all the way from Italy so that he could watch a thirty million Euro prototype killing machine being sent to peaceful Japan to attend high school.

"What I'm worried about is the way you asked me to condition her." Giuliani explained. "It's never been done before. It was risky and untested…"

"Yet you carried out the procedure anyway." Mardukas shot back.

"Only because I thought you were assigning it…" Tessa winced at how Giuliani referred to Megumi as an object rather than a living thing, "…to an actual V.I.P., not some high school girl who is a magnet for trouble!"

"You said…" Mardukas started, only to be interrupted when Tessa held out a hand to signal she wanted to speak. The ever loyal seaman, the Commander respectfully stepped back.

"Dr. Giuliani," Tessa said in as polite a voice she could manage, "We have been through this before. Our agreement with the SWA says we can do whatever we want with this cyborg, as long as we send you this mission data. This means if we are sending her to a high school, then we are well within or agreement." Tessa explained. "You have no right to object.."

Giuliani slumped down on his chair. Apparently, he too was all too aware of the arguments that had flown between them for the last series of pointless meetings. Still…

"A high school girl? We give you the most advanced prototype bodyguard we have, and you assign her to a high school girl?" He shook his head. This prototype was supposed to allow him and his team to monitor a cyborg's state of mind when attached to two 'masters', but with where it was right now, it didn't seem likely and meaningful data would appear.

Lorenzo would have his head on a platter with the budget he wasted on a long distance deep cover model.

And worse, Bianchi would never let him live this down.

High school girl? He'd be the laughing stock.

"How am I… how are we going to collect any meaningful data like that?"

Tessa smiled sweetly. If only the good doctor knew of the kind of things that happened to Kaname and Sousuke on a daily basis.

--

"Alright. Talk." Kaname ordered.

The trio were seated around the wooden table in Sousuke's sparse living room. It looked like an interrogation, with the girl across the table from the two examiners.

"I am a second generation mechanical body." The girl explained. "More specifically, a special deep cover bodyguard type mechanical body, designed to safeguard essential personnel without backup from a team of medical specialists."

With that she produced a Mithril ID card, similar to the one Sousuke owned, as proof of identity. Sousuke quickly inspected the card, reading the ID number and comparing it against some reference in his head before he was finally satisfied. "Thank you Megumi."

Kaname looked perplexed, with good reason. "Mechanical body?"

Sousuke on the other hand…

"I wasn't aware Mithril condoned the use of Mechanical bodies." Sousuke noted. "The only ones I've ever encountered were all out in the field as hostiles."

"Sousuke?"

Megumi nodded an affirmative. "Correct Goushujin-sama. Mithril normally does not condone the use of mechanical bodies such as myself. However, given the number of kidnapping attempts made by Amalgam of Ojou-sama, the Madame Captain had me specifically commissioned to supplement Ojou-sama's guard detail."

"Tessa-chan did what? Wait… Commissioned?" Kaname snapped her head back and forth as the conversation shifted between the other two people.

Sousuke held his chin in deep thought. "Hm, perhaps this was what the Madame Captain was hinting to me over the comm… Anyway, I take it your current mission parameters are to protect Kaname Chidori and I am your designated handler?"

"That is correct Goshujin-sama. However, my parameters include Ojou-sama as a person which handler level protective status." Megumi clarified.

By this point, Sousuke and Megumi were in a world completely separate from the one Kaname lived in. She was reduced to gaping like a fish on the sidelines. What kind of conversation was this?

"That is unusual. I'm not well versed with cyborg team M.O., but correct me if I'm wrong, don't most mechanical body settings only involve a handler and the operative?"

"That is correct Goshujin-sama. Actually, Ojou-sama holds the position of 'V.I.P.' in my settings. My primary mission is to assist in her protection against hostile elements."

"Hm. So what kind of combat experience do you have?"

"None, except for basic CQC and firearms training. Lieutenant Kalinin recommended that I be sent to you as soon as possible. He believed that Goushujin-sama would be fully capable in my training and would better shape me to the environment."

"Lieutenant Kalinin is a wise man."

"Indeed."

--

Five minutes of endless techno babble later, Megumi hit another milestone in her life.

She made Kaname Chidori lose patience.

Really how could they miss it? Kaname was stamping, not tapping, stamping, her foot under the table, eyebrows twitching and a vein throbbing on her head.

"HOLD IT!" She slammed her open palm down on the table to get the two undercover agents attention. Both of them stared back up at her at the exact same moment.

The same blank expression.

And they answered her in the same monotone voice as well.

"What is it Chidori?"

"What is it Ojou-sama?'

Silence reigned for one awkward moment. Then Kaname cleared her voice out. Okay. That was slightly freaky. But more to the point… "How come you and her can understand what each other are saying?"

"I wasn't aware Megumi was speaking in anything other than Japanese Chidori." Sousuke answered completely clueless as to her plight.

"No that's NOT it." Kaname growled. "You are telling me, this child is somehow some kind of weapon…"

"Cybernetically enhanced human being." Megumi supplied helpfully.

"…that was sent here by Tessa-chan of all people for the sole purpose of protecting me?" Kaname finished.

Sousuke nodded his head. "Mechanical Bodies are more classified than ECM technology, so your surprise is understandable. However, I commend you for beginning to grasp the situation so quickly."

"She's a little girl!"

"Ojou-sama, I am five feet tall. While this is hardly high, I would by no means describe myself as 'little'…"

Kaname sweat dropped. "Oh god, she's a mini-version of you."

"I can see considerable differences between myself and her. For one we are of different genders." Sousuke pointed out.

"What about some proof?" Kaname demanded. "Show me some proof right now!"

--

Sousuke was livid. "Why did you do that!?"

"I judged it was the method that would best impress my cyborg nature upon Ojou-sama!"

"That was the most useful shotgun I had!"

"Goshuin-sama, I do believe you have several semi-automatic shotguns in your possession. I do not see how the loss of one inferior pump action…"

"You turned a valuable piece of military equipment into a junk!"

"Casualties are inevitable in war!"

Poking the pretzel shaped piece of metal that was once Sousuke's favorite pump action shotgun with her finger, Kaname tried to suppress a smirk.

--

"Okay, so you are a superhuman cyborg. I get the picture." Kaname sighed. "… just tell me why heck is she dressed like some gothic Lolita maid and using all those weird terms?"

"What weird term, Ojou-sama?"

"THAT term!" Kaname jabbed her finger viciously at Megumi, who just stared back impassively at her new charge. "Ojou-sama this! Goshujin-sama that! What the hell did you learn these things?"

Megumi tilted her head in confusion. "I was informed by a credible source that this would be the proper way of referring to my handlers in Japan. Was… I wrong?"

"Krutz and another of his childish pranks no doubt." Kaname fumed. "And it must have been an elaborate one… those clothes look like they must have cost a pretty penny."

"Actually, it was the Madame Captain who gave me these clothes." Megumi had little idea of the absurdity of what she had just said.

Kaname lost her footing and fell to the floor. Sousuke who was taking a drink from his warm coffee mug did an awesome spit take. Sousuke recovered first. "Tessa did WHAT?"

"Is it so surprising, Goshujin-sama?" Megumi queried. "Tessa is the only one on the TDD that has clothes that could possibly fit one with a stature as small as mine. Would it not stand that she would give me some of hers for the operation?"

For a moment both teen paused.

Kaname tried to associate her image of the prim and proper diminutive submarine captain with this Goth attire. Surprisingly it was very easy to do. Reflecting on her memories of the young Italian, Kaname found a disturbing number of times in her memories that should have hinted of this shocking outcome. Tessa liked that waitress outfit a little too much to be normal and she did spend a lot of time in the lingerie section inspecting some very risqué articles of clothing.

To think all along Tessa was into this stuff.

For Sousuke, the problem was very different. The thoughts of his mild mannered superior's possible fetishes didn't even cross his mind. Instead, he envisioned what would happen if Mardukas ever caught Tessa wearing this set of attire in his apartment. It involved a torpedo tube, a large number of explosives, himself screaming like a little girl and the maniacal laughter of the demon commander could be heard in the distant background.

Then it occurred to him if anyone caught Megumi, looking like the poster child for jailbait material, in his apartment like his… It was far from a pretty picture.

Kaname and Sousuke shivered simultaneously.

"What about your manner of speech?" Kaname tried to salvage the tattered image of her close friend. "Tessa can't possibly be responsible for that too can she?"

Megumi produced a hardcover large manual and placed it on the table before them.

Kaname reached forward to inspect the book. A drop of sweat formed on the back of her head. "Lets see… 'So you're now a Teenage Killing Machine; Guide to being a Cyborg Operative, Japanese Edition. By Triela Hartmann. Translation by Danielle'… what the… this is legit?!"

"Positive." Megumi said with complete confidence. "Although I have had no prior contact with other extra junior operatives, intelligence had informed me that this text is in circulation in every government cyborg affiliated agency around the globe."

Kaname and Sousuke huddled together and inspected its contents. There were colored tabs and dog ears thought its well read pages with a multitude of scribbled notes in what was presumed to be Megumi's nice handwriting in the margins. While the two teenagers could admire Megumi's dedication, this was overshadowed by the horrifying contents of the said book.

Kaname kept rereading the chapter titles in complete disbelief.

Sousuke had simply broken out in cold sweat.

--

Unknown to the oblivious Megumi, the truth of the matter was that the book she had used as reference was not quite what she thought it was.

There had been absolutely no circumstances where this infamous piece of text has actually been put to use in the field. Normally the point of reference for cyborg operatives would be their handlers, who actually use the more credible text of 'Cyborg Handler's Field Guide, by Croche J.' in the event consulting some written authority was required.

It was certainly more credible than a document written up as a practical joke by a bored assassin in Italy with one long mischievous streak. In fact, most members in the various cyborgs agencies, handlers and cyborgs alike, viewed this infamous text as an endless source amusement the same way one might like a good joke book.

No one, save the most far gone cyborgs, would in their right mind wear Goth-Lolita twenty four seven while 'un-intentionally' trying to seduce their handlers to the dark side.

Nobody had ever taken this piece of text seriously. Well until of course, a certain Japanese speaking cyborg ever required some point of reference, and was too oblivious to tell when something was meant to be taken as a joke.

It certainly didn't help that the only person who was willing to do the Japanese translation of the said book was a self professed Japanophile who decided to add a little spin to it.

--

"Sousuke, this has to be too surreal even for you." Kaname said as the two older teens leafed through the book together. Megumi sat across the table, watching them curiously.

"For once, I agree." Sousuke admitted, eternally grateful that he could intervene before his new partner had decided to implement 'Chapter 9, How to properly bathe your Handler'.

Then they saw… it.

"Megumi… were you really planning on cleaning all of Sousuke's guns?" Kaname laughed nervously, showing Megumi a paragraph in the text that was highlighted, had a circle drawn around it and tabbed for good measure.

"Yes Ojou-sama. According to the book, helping my handler with the maintenance of his weapons is good for handler-cyborg relations. It will leave a lasting impression on my handler." Megumi answered honestly.

"With your Panties?!" Kaname almost screeched.

"Only if they are cotton, and only to strengthen my bond with my handler." Megumi said in a manner of fact tone. "I was only going to do this after I'd had gotten some clothes of my own. You do remember that right now everything I have is on loan from the Madame Cap…"

Sousuke passed out in dead faint and Kaname began slamming her head against the wall to clear her mind of the image.

Megumi sprang to her feet. "Ojou-sama, stop doing that! You may cause irrevocable brain damage to yourself! More importantly, we should administer first aid immediately! I fear Goshujin-sama has had a heart attack!"

--

When Kaname awoke the next day, the events of the previous night were still fresh on her mind. After the unveiling of the great book of doom, Kaname hadn't stuck around much longer after that. Sousuke had confirmed with his comrades at Mithril that Megumi was indeed legit. Tessa even sent her warm regards and asked if Megumi needed anything further from her wardrobe, seemingly ignorant of the damage her choice of clothing had done to her image in the eyes of her two friends.

Sousuke quickly declined when he heard a stern clearing of a throat on the other end of his Radio.

Madrukas was hovering over Tessa like a hawk as usual.

Anyway, Kaname had left, tried and not wanting to play the confusion game with the bewildered Sousuke, who now had the daunting task of properly settling in his new ward. It was for the best.

Case and point, Megumi had insisted that she must sleep in the nude, on Sousuke's bed no less, to better familiarize herself with her 'equally dressed' handler. Sousuke had almost flipped.

Kaname hadn't missed Sousuke's pleading eyes when Megumi's suggestion cropped up, the same eyes that screamed 'help me' she had seen the day a certain white-haired captain decided to invade his humble abode and turn his life into a waking hell. Oh no, better him than me.

Besides, Megumi couldn't actually be serious… could she?

Kaname didn't miss the parting comment from Megumi that the young cyborg could be coming to her home next, perhaps permanently.

God forbid.

Kaname decided she'd have a good long talk with Sousuke on the way to school that fine morning, but oddly he wasn't there to meet her on their usual walk together to school.

This made her 'slightly apprehensive'. Sousuke never missed their morning walks together. 'Someone might ambush you on your way to school', he'd often cited.

In the back of her mind, Kaname instantly knew something was wrong.

Her fears were confirmed when she stepped into class before the bell had rung only to see Sousuke already there. Seated slouched over his desk, eyes bloodshot and face pale, it was obvious the soldier hadn't gotten a wink of sleep last night.

He looked so bad, their concerned friends has surrounded him. He turned them away with his usual false assurances, and as usual they bought it. Only Kaname knew of what transpired the previous day, and only she knew his state was more serious than his usual sleep deprivation.

"Sousuke?" Kaname asked with concern. A single night did this to him?

"Chidori." Sousuke returned in monotone. "I couldn't stop her."

Couldn't stop what? Kaname's mind flew to the dreaded... Her schoolbag clattered to the floor. book. Oh no! She WAS serious! How could this happen? If Megumi would bend steel with her bare hands, Sousuke wouldn't be a match for her! Kaname knew that girl was bad news but this…!

Kaname's mouth ran dry. Could she have prevented this? No it was that book's fault for sending all those ideas into Megumi's head!

Whoever Triela Hartmann was, she must be a very sick, sick, SICK person to have created such a monstrosity.

--

"Achoo!"

"Bless you." Claes said.

"I should see Bianci. I think I'm coming down with something."

--

"Sousuke… I don't know what to say…"

"It was a direct order from Tes… Madame Captain." Sousuke whispered. "She was the one who finalized the documents."

Kaname's face went blank. You could almost see a big question mark pop up over her head. "…What?"

"It makes no sense." Sousuke continued. "Japanese society doesn't work that way. It will raise all sorts of questions."

"What are you talking about Sousuke? What's going on?"

Then the bell rang.

--

"Class, I'd so proud to announce that we have a new student here today! She's a child prodigy so I'd like you to look after her alright?"

Kaname heard Sousuke's head hitting his desk, his fingers twitching like he wanted to draw his gun and start shooting, if only to relive his stress. It didn't take that much more than that for her to connect the dots.

So, given her lack of options in the matter, Kaname's head too met cool surface of her table. She could feel the tears streaming from her eyes. God was so cruel…

"Class, please give a warm welcome to Sagara, Megumi!"

And all hell broke loose.

--

And so Megumi Sagara, 'younger sister' to Sousuke Sagara, came to Japan.

And there was chaos.

…

…

…or at least, more chaos than normal. You never know with Japanese high schools these days.

--

A/N

I put the Seras chapter on indefinite hold in favor of this, which is IMHO a more interesting chapter. As a side note, this might not be the last you've seen of Megumi Sagara. I have a few ideas regarding her. Not sure when I'll act on them though.


End file.
